Thursday, September 25, 2008

So-Called Teen Fashionistas

Teen fashionistas. The sort that say "Oooh, I love fashion". And then proceed to tell you about their giant Dolce and Gabbana belt and Louis Vuitton bag. The ones that go "what?" when you mention dear Martin Margiela to them. The sort that go "who?" when you mention Anna to them. Anna Wintour. This women is demi-god of fashion; and the so called "fashionista" does not know who Anna is.
I hate these sort of people. This blog has genuine teenagers interested in fashion reading it. I know this because the fakes and phonies I had banned from the blog.

Unfortunately Chanel's acquired a status of "desirability" among the so-called "fashionistas" who've never heard of Comme des Garcons. I am very upset about this. I do not want ugly girls who wear jeans-and-a-disgusting-white-t-shirt carrying a Chanel bag. I do not want some celebrity wearing Chanel sunglasses. It disgusts me. Chanel is not for everyone. In bold, hmm? Chanel is not for people who are fat, despite what the motivational T.V speakers say. You're getting fat watching the speaker on T.V anyway, hmm? Go out and run to Paris! From New York, from LA....oh, LA. LA the land of the "casual". LA the land of fat women, fat women like Paris Hilton and Mary-Kate Olsen. These fatties are worshiped there! Mary-Kate is adorable, but when was the last time she wore Chanel, hmmmmmm?
No, Mary-Kate is wearing Balenciaga and Marc. Disgusting.

I just sent a memo to Brad at security- all the security guards are called Brad. We're going to run Chanel with bouncers now. Who cares about the money, hmm? We have one trillion dollars in assets. We have more property than McDonald's (cue vomit) and the Catholic Church combined. We own a Tardis. We can time travel. We're bigger than Andre Leon Talley!

Anna and I went to a resturant today, by the way. Andre was there. They had a 3 hour long staring match. Through sunglasses.


bohobum said...

exactly! when I'm walking the grocery store & see some mom in MOM jeans carrying a chanel tote she bought for 40 bucks at 'too cute' OR a twenty something in a painfully mundane jc penny's sales rack outfit w/ the same bag.
I think, why? what does chanel mean to you?
then I imagine the look of disgust you would aim at these people and it cheers me up.

ann said...

karl- you forgot to mention the ball of horror that is Cory Kennedy.

Vidal Wu said...

This has Heidi written all over it.

Paula Pasquali said...

agree with you, dear Karl (as always).

p.s.: long time no see!

Annie said...

so who's banned?

Julien said...

I love seeing these people. It reminds me what I am not.

Anyway, if you want to confuse these teeny trolls (who are catching onto Balenciaga by the way; horendous but true) just ask them who Nicolas Ghesquiere is; or Rei, or Alber.

This confuses them and causes steam to erupt from their ears, their heads spin and 'brains'fry.

They then get fat and should no longer wear skinny jeans (but they will). This is how you can tell a 'fashion person' from a fashion person.

Everyone knows a brand and logo; not everyone knows who is behind the brand.

Vidal Wu said...

Well said, Julien.

Alyssar said...

Jesus FUCKING Christ I love you.

Amused said...

wow you are all incredibly sad!! hahahaha!
I can't believe how much this shit all means to you... open your eyes to the real world once in a while... i can't believe how completely naive you sound!

Your complete oblivion or disregard to any walks of life that aren't walked in top of the line stilettos disgusts me....

You think you are so high and mighty for sitting on the computer for hours on end or studying back issues of vogue memorising the names of french designers etc so you can impress your friends... but all the while, Mr Lagerfeld doesn't ACTUALLY give a shit about you, he just enjoys the revenue.