Saturday, June 28, 2008

Closets

Hmm, what to say tonight?
Yves has got back to being alive and is as melancholy as he was when he was uhh, "alive". His bulldog (Pierre) found out about our little scheme and is furious with me. Not Yves of course; it's all my fault. I "lead Yves astray" apparently. Astray from what, I wonder?
The bulldog has never liked me, as you probably know. "Karl is just an imitator", "Karl cannot create", and on he goes. He has a duty to say this- he's Yves' promoter, manager, etc. God forbid someone as talented as Yves be alive. Chanel, fine. She's dead, no competition to him. Same with all the other dead geniuses. (Would Yves like Proust if Proust were still alive? ((keeping in mind he worships Proust)) Probably not).
So for the bulldog to respect you, you must be dead or Yves.

Yves is both, technically.

At the moment Yves is hiding in the broom closest. Nobody quite knows why (the bulldog's having tea with me anyway. In France, in high France even enemies act like the best of friends).
But Yves does that sort of thing. Tortured "artiste" or something. Just make the goddamed dresses, hmm?

It's a pretty good closest though. Many great people have hidden in it, taken tea in it. There is nothing more sophisticated that wearing a Chanel jacket and taking tea in the closest of a sophisticated French house. Because you see, the closest is the most intimate part of a person's house. Although I have a theory that possibly the bathroom is more intimate.

Carpet is important in a closest too. Many people use outdated carpet, because they think nobody will ever see the closest. But what if I come along? It is only polite to offer tea in the closet to a great person. In which case the person with bad closet carpeting is not very important, because they don't expect me to come and take tea in their house.

Some advice for life, hmm?
1.) Hide in closets at your own leisure
2.) Carpet your closets well
3.) The most sophisticated thing you can do is take tea in your closet.

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