Thursday, December 25, 2008

A response

I was planning on having uh spiked diet Coke all night, but my Niece Tavi sent me this link.
WHO DO THEY THINK THEY ARE, HMMM? THESE PEOPLE...WHO WEAR THEIR JUICY COUTURE SWEATSUITS AND THEIR RALPH LAUREN SWEATERS AND GUESS PURSES AND THEIR BRITNEY PERFUME WITH THEIR SIGNED JONAS BROTHERS POSTERS ON THEIR WALLS.

Britney perfume! One might as well bottle head shavings and vomit; coupled with the Jonas brothers virginal sweat (I suspect they're as virginal as Madonna as a Catholic schoolgirl). And "Guess" is a brand worn by teenage girls desperate for attention with no taste, hmm? It is a brand worn by the anti-christ herself!

And who is this anti-christ, you ask? It is the woman who wrote the "Time" article. Scroll down if you want to see her; she's too demode for I to post. She is the anti-chirst. Call up the churches, call the Pope, call Obama, call Ron Paul, call the polygamists, call Xenu, call Tom Cruise. Strike that. Don't call Tom Cruise. Call Suri, call Elton John, call Warren Buffet, call every single person in this god damned earth apart from Tom Cruise.
Hell (ooh, burning reference there), even call Rachel Zoe. She'll be happy because she won't have to pay her massive credit card debt for buying that dress. Call the Spanish Inquisition!

...NOT THE SPANISH INQUISITION.

Ahem.

This woman is the anti-chirst, with a vendetta against Anna and I. Next she'll be targeting the sacred estate of Coco Chanel; telling everyone to wear scrunchies and metallic hotpants.

Evil I tell you. And not the good evil. The bad evil. The bad bad evil. The non-fashionable evil.
This woman is probably paid by PETA. She is probably one of the animal-actors in their videos.
NOW, I will have my diet Coke. On the rocks, Anna; on the rocks.

6 comments:

Tavi said...

Demode.
I have Alber on the phone right now, Uncle.

André said...

The financial crisis is demodé.
They even cancelled CHANEL MOBILE ART...

...how sad. I'll have a Diet Coke on the rocks too.

Jeunesse said...

I recall when somebody mistook my $2000 Balenciaga jacket as being from this demode "guess" store. My assistant slapped the disgusting ugly fatty with her cashmere gloves (which I told her to throw away soon afterwards).

Moral of the story: Fatties, don't stop First Class passengers at the airport where they get their nice expensive stuff. It's rude. And you also get your fatty filth on their clothes.

BTW, I'm so loving Tavi right now.

Anonymous said...

Alber is the only chic fatty I know. And maybe Oprah, she uses Chanel, at least.

Sarah said...

LOL Karl! The things you say! I have a Guess purse and i hate myself for it! My mom got it for me last Christmas and if i made her return it, she would get pissed at me! And the Brittney Perfume? I personally can't buy ANYTHING that is made by celebrities! All they do is pay some people with no life yet exceptional talent and make them design something then the already rich celebrity puts THEIR name on it then sells it!!! How pathetic!

<3 Sarah

Anonymous said...

This is too fake. Karl doesn't have a daughter, niece, or family. Karl hates Americans, he only wants their money.