Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Silent Film

By the way, I made a silent film. The real reason is that I'm sick of people talking all the time. "TALK TALK TALK!" they are, but they say nothing, hmm? So I thought if they saw the film they'll see that these people in the film don't talk much, in fact they don't talk at all, because it's silent. And when they need to say something they have little, leading by example, no?

Second, I thought life could have a soundtrack; like silent movies. I've hired a pianist who is on a movable platform- I take him everywhere. Right now, for instance, he is playing the accompaniment to my life as I dictate this to one of my assistants. He's pretty good looking, too. I found him in the closet whilst I was on...sabbatical. Poor guy, he was just in the corner looking kind of glum. He's in black and white, actually. As in, movie-black-and-white. So the area around him is also black and white. It's all very chic.

Now, there's a reason I went on...sabbatical. It's because the flickering was getting pretty bad, hmm? The "real world" was fading away; and who else am I going to make fun of but the "real world" people? I litterally couldn't touch a pen that cost less that 100 dollars; or else it would just vanish. I was that out of touch with reality. It was messing with my head a little, hmm? As Jane said the other day.."Daddy needs his meds". Apart from I am the drugs.
Fashion becomes very ugly when it's all you can see, you know. Did you know that most models look like a twig which has been drained of it's twig-ness and is now a figment of a twig? I wasn't sure if they were human, let alone female. You notice these things when reality is barely there.

I am back now, hmm? I love you all. Apart from you, and you, and you. And the fat one over there. And what are you doing wearing wayfarers?


Ms. Butterfly said...

I'm wearing my Yves Saint Laurent's actually.

Aynsley said...

We love you too, Karl.


Anonymous said...

you're not funny anymore

Karl Lagerfeld said...

Oh Anonymous, I'm so very sorry. Because you know, I write this blog for you and all. Just you, personally. Nobody else. Because you're just so gosh-darn important, isn't that right?

ed said...









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