Sunday, October 26, 2008

Emotions

You know, emotions are so overrated.
"Ooooh I feel this! Ooooh I feel that! Oooh I feel you!"
They're demode, hm? You can't do anything with them. I don't care what you feel, either. Unless you are feeling me, in which case take your hands off me (that includes you Tom Ford).
Don't take the doctor's advice; go on and suppress your emotions, like me. Put on sunglasses and you'll be fine. Hoist up those skinny jeans and you'll be fine. Don't eat and you'll be fine.

I function perfectly. You see this perfectly chiseled face? No, not mine- Brad's. That's the sign of a perfect life. I dole out emotion sparingly. Emotion is not free. When I'm sympathizing with you I could be sketching another collection. You'll be fine: you know that, I know that. Don't be an emotion whore, hmm? I mean...prostitutes earn money from whoring, but you do not.
So. Being emotional is like being a whore. Go and sketch or something when your boyfriend breaks up with you instead.

Emotional whores, eww.

Secondly, there is this "Love" thing. Where you might love someone and they might love you but you're too scared to say anything to them. This is a problem. Just wear the black glasses.

That is all.

6 comments:

Jasmina said...

"Don't eat and you'll be fine."

agree.

Arabelle said...

i am glad i am not an emotional whore now. you appprove.

Haley said...

Oh my god Karl, I love this.

I mean...um...I have no strong emotion towards this but I quietly approve.

Eilynn said...

Black glasses obscure my view to the screen something awful.

Zohra said...

I used to have emotions... and then I found out my best friend was sleeping with my boy behind my back. And then there was emotion overload! Which was totally demode.

So now I live a much chic-er life emotion free. I dropped like fifty pounds worth of emotions, how wonderful.

Uncle Karl, if your daughter ever gets lonely and you feel like adopting, I put myself forward for the selection process.

Mo said...

Emotions are so annoying. When people cry, their tears wash away the makeup and you see their faces. Put on the sunglasses and stop crying!