PLEASE EXPLAIN TO ME WHY I DO NOT HAVE A COPY OF VOGUE ITALIA AT THIS VERY MOMENT.
So I just bought a stack of new ones just in case. They are so shiny and pretty all stacked in the corner... I might call in Demarchelier just to take a photo of them. (Don't tell Karl I think Patrick takes much better photos - Karl just follows around pretty male models and calls it a new photographic movement.)
I cleaned out the Closet today - which basically means I declared the entire thing demode and Karl and I drank a lot of Veuve and watched the interns shred everything. Then we had a photoshoot.
Tom Ford came by this afternoon. I really love that man, but he is just so... gay. I mean, he has his chest hair selectively tweezed by little Korean women. And his eyebrows are perfect. I think he is a robot. A very very gay robot. I mentioned that Karl was coming later, and he got weepy and started blubbering about how he 'just wanted Karl to like him' blah blah blah. I gave him a bottle of Veuve and a Xanax and told him to leave immediately.
THIS COFFEE IS COLD. FIX IT NOW.
I must leave you, adoring public. Karl is coming and we have to hide the models.