Tuesday, June 16, 2009

"Current" Things and So On

It's not often I do a post to do with a "current" issue, because this blog is a sort of escape from doing something directly involved with fashion design and shows and all that. Designing the ballet costumes was like that too. I could easily be a full time costume designer, you know. I have this vision of pancake makeup and the deep thick fog of perfume and the velvet of the curtain; the hustle and bustle of the actors and dancers frenetically moving like trains crashing into lights. I, standing at the center of a yelping crowd of women wanting to be dressed. That's a bit like fashion, you see- yet it has that certain magic. With fashion, you need to create the magic. Everybody assumes that the magic's already there, but the fact is that my high collar does not magically come on every morning. I have to put it on. Maybe I will be a costume designer. Oh ho ho, that'll freak out the fashion people. I can't wait to read the "obituaries" the mindless magazines write, those magazines that like the look of their own ink so much (not so much the content). I suppose Ohio Horyn would write an obituary too. And Menkes. And all the bloggers, but they're not exactly Ohio Horyn, hmm?
It's like that musical, Oklahoma:

Poor Karl is dead

Poor Karl Lagerfeld is dead

All gather round his quilted coffin now and bitch

He had no heart at all

And he wasn't very old

Oh why did such a feller have to switch to costume design?

Oh, I'd love that. Reading the self-congratulatory drivel that these "journalists" write makes Yohji and I chuckle. Yohji drinks his beer. I drink my diet Coke. Here, I'll write a sentence for you:

"Fashion legend Karl Lagerfeld retired yesterday, saying he was going to design costumes. He claimed there was no more glamour in fashion, and costumes were a greater reflection of the zeitgeist than fashion."

Now, if we're Ohio Horyn the paragraph will start with:

"I was making my chicken pot-pie yesterday, after cleaning out the barn, when I heard that Karl Lagerfeld was retiring to design costumes."

I'm not going to do that, though. I have no intention on retiring because I'm a stubborn bastard, and retiring would give too many people satisfaction. Anyway, I can design costumes on the side. I always have. I'll simply have some pancake makeup installed at Chanel. An entire closet full of it. There's a wonderful TV show called "Imagination Movers". It is by Playhouse Disney- a child wearing a tuxedo introduced me to it. They have rooms full of every sort of thing you could imagine. A "cold" room, a "noise" room and so on. Most commendable.

Anyway, I remembered why I was writing this post. It is to congratulate the Rodarte sisters (Kate and Laura) on their CFDA win. I'm very proud of you, girls!


Madeline said...

All right I'm sick of having this conversation via Tavi's comments. So here's my rebuttal.

By the logic of "the seamstress work isn't worth it" you are discounting the validity of countless fine collections. Just because a piece of clothing is not difficult to make does not mean it is not good. Most designer clothing is not worth the price. You can't single out Kane for overcharging, because EVERY designer does it. And the fact that something is visually uncomplicated doesn't mean that intellectual energy wasn't put into it. THAT'S all I'm trying to say. I'm not saying he's a genius or that a more conceptual approach to the same inspiration wouldn't have been good or better, I'm just defending his design process.

Sorry if I'm being annoying, I just love discussing fashion designers and nobody I know in real life does. So I gotta bring it to the Internet. Because I'm a dork. ANYWAY I really like your blog! Especially when Yves guest stars.

Karl Lagerfeld said...

Madeline, you're more than welcome to continue this conversation, but please email me (faekarl at gmail dot com) instead of post here, hmm?

So- email me a quick hello and I'll send you my rebuttal, if you wish.

The Alterpenguin Superdork said...

The collar has to be "put" on???
Oh the shame...
Surely God could design a self fulfilling collar?
My bubble just burst AND messed on my shoes.