It is Karl!
Today I rung up random people and shouted "CHANEL!!!" into the bit where you talk. Then I licked the bit where you talk forming the Chanel logo. Then I threw the telephone out of the window. THEN I got down to business:
This man:
Mr. Pencil-Stealer. Pencil Thief. My assistants captured him. He's in Anna's closet, locked up with that daughter of hers. Buzz. Queen. Bee- yes, that's it. Bee. I can't imagine that they're getting along too well, Anna says he pretends to be French these days. "Oh I amm zJohn zGalliano, yess". He designs for Dior or something. Dior is so out of date, so stuck in the 1950s. "KEEP THE WAIST IN! ZE WOMEN IS AN HOURGLASS." He forgot to mention that the customers of Dior are all over 50, hmm? For the couture, anyway. (Which I design- they're jokes I share with Rei. We send each other ridiculous designs and people like John pick up on them and steal them. This is the basis of most couture today, hmm?).
So after much interrogation "I do not have zis pencil you speak of", "what pencil??" "I do not speak zee English", we got the pencil back. In is now back in allied hands. The world can rest at peace again.
(And yes, astute readers. I have had my pencil taken away before-as you may notice if you read back far enough. The pencil is very important, hmm? Martin Margiela sells a replica of it for $5000, on demand only)