Wednesday, April 23, 2008

I Am


I woke up this morning from a dream I’d had:
I was at a dreadful party with dreadful people who should not be allowed to wear Chanel (it should be only for Chic people only, non? I hate it when the fatties wear my clothes. The uglies are even worse*
And there I was, obviously bored, being chatted up by some creature. She was telling me I should get a “blog”. I thought this was a fabulous idea because I could teach the people who visit this “internet” how to be proper human beings.

Of course I’m not actually typing this out on a computer (I had my Mac G5 melted down into more rings, is much more useful, hmm?), but writing it out with my favourite pencil (one must have a favourite pencil) on specially monogrammed “KL” paper. Then I told an assistant to type it out and put it on the internet.

Now I must leave you. Because, unlike you, I have things to do.

*Speaking of, have you ever seen this American TV show, “Ugly Betty”? I should hope that you haven’t, as it is a hideous programme which pretends that there’s a place in fashion for ugly and fat people. There isn’t. So if you are reading my “blog” and you are either of those things, I advise you to close your browser now and never come back. Thankyou.

Love, Karl.

3 comments:

i k a said...

I just found your site and this is a fabulous way to start of your blog ♥

Gina Ray said...

I just found your blog...and i had to read the first one ( which inspired me to get a nose job and lose 30lbs... ;)... ) you are amazing..love the blog...

aftab khatri said...

I believe that grab my essays are nay as firm to happen by. If persons remain lesson blogs want yours further wearing the info to outdo their paper thereupon the norm devise uplift additionally besides seniors resolution comprehend superior characteristic documents than what they are wont to.